The Reason You Have A Cold Is Because Your Feet Stink!

Something very very very amusing was talked about tonight. A week ago, I fell sick with a cold, and I kindly let Tina's parents know about it.

Fast forward a couple of days later. When I got home from work, I took my shoes and socks off, and walked barefoot around the house. I saw Tina's mum in the kitchen, and she started talking to me in German. After a bit of dialogue, she gestured at her feet, wearing socks and slippers, and gestured at my bare feet, then said more German which I didn't understand. But the part which I thought I understood properly was that she pointed at my feet, pinched her nose, and then said schnupfen, among other German words.

And immediately I realised she was offended by my smelly feet, just by the way she said schnupfen when pinching her nose. It sounded more like Pfffoar! Your feet are smelly as, bro! They weren't overly smelly, but maybe she had a keen sense of smell, as women do, so I immediately stammered Entschuldigung, or excuse me in German. She walked out of the kitchen, and I stood there feeling quite stink (excuse the pun!). Feeling bad that I stunk the kitchen, I proceeded to take a shower and clean my feet.

Just today, I was retelling the story to Tina. And I learnt that she actually knew about it because her mum told her the entire story, as mothers and daughters do. Oh great, now she's not the only one who knows about my smelly feet. "Smelly feet?", she asked. "What on earth are you talking about?"

It turned out that Tina's mum wasn't referring to smelly feet at all. She was referring to my cold. Schnupfen means runny nose, and according to her the reason I had a cold was because I walked barefoot in the house. Hence when she pointed at my feet, pinched her nose, and said schnupfen, she was actually saying that walking barefoot in the house had caused my runny nose. I thought schnupfen meant smelly feet! Why else would she pinch her nose? Perhaps holding a tissue paper would have illustrated a runny nose situation better.

Tina was in splits. She proceeded to make an international call to her mum in Germany, and laugh even more at my expense. Her mum was apologetic in making me feel stink (excuse the pun again!). Nevertheless, I learnt three things.

• Don't walk barefoot around the house, otherwise you'll catch a cold.
  
• Make sure your feet are clean , so others don't run for cover.
  
• Learn more German, so you don't end up in embarrassing situations like this.

How embarrassing.

Sunset Boulevard

With one look I'll ignite a blaze
I'll return to my glory days
They'll say, "Norma's back at last!"

On Easter Monday, I treated myself to a musical on the West End, seeing a show that I have always wanted to see for a very long time. So, upon arriving in the UK, when I saw that Sunset Boulevard was showing at the West End I got really excited and resolved to go, but preferably with another person. After a few months of not finding a fan of Andrew Lloyd Webber to go with, I decided to treat myself after a tiring Easter weekend.

I grew up on the music of Andrew Lloyd Webber, after listening and playing the great songs like The Phantom of the Opera, The Music of the Night, Memory, Don't Cry For Me Argentina, Jesus Christ Superstar, Any Dream Will Do, to name a very few. However I've only seen one of his musicals, which was Phantom of the Opera. Being from a small country, musicals by Andrew Lloyd Webber don't often feature, but they are held regularly on the West End in London, or Broadway in New York. With Sunset Boulevard and Joseph and the Amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat now playing on the West End, it was a chance for me to see my second Andrew Lloyd Webber musical, and I chose Sunset Boulevard.

Sunset Boulevard is based on the 1950 film of the same title. The plot revolves around Norma Desmond, a faded star of the silent screen era, living in the past in her decaying mansion on the fabled Los Angeles street. When young screenwriter Joe Gillis accidentally crosses her path, she sees in him an opportunity to make her comeback to the big screen. What follows is a story of romance, comedy and, ultimately, tragedy. Kind of like a play written by Shakespeare without the old English dialogue.

The musical first opened in London in 1993, and has had several long runs internationally. However it also lost money because of its running costs and legal battles, making the show a flop-hit. The West End run finally ended in 1996, and it was only in 2008 that a London revival for Sunset Boulevard had started. It was a minimalist production, directed by Craig Revel Horwood, best known as that judge on Dancing with the Stars in New Zealand, and Strictly Come Dancing in the UK.

And when I saw the show, it was indeed a minamalist production. The actors on stage were also musicians on stage. Instead of a dedicated orchestra, the actors themselves played the score to the songs of Sunset Boulevard! It was so well coordinated that the actors played the musical instruments in such a way that it fitted naturally to the scene and the setting. Also, the actors often had to play more than one instrument as required by the score at the time, and whichever actors were actually engaged in the acting and singing of the scene. The "spare actors" not required in the scene would be lending support with their musical instruments. This takes multi-talented to a whole new level!

Sunset Boulevard is like Phantom of the Opera in reverse. The Phantom longs for Christine in Phantom of the Opera, and Norma Desmond longs for Joe Gillis in Sunset Boulevard. Neither protagonist get the other character in the end. The music is also in the same vein as Phantom of the Opera, with its dramatic sweeping melodies (Too Much In Love To Care, As If We Never Said Goodbye), and the lyrics tell the story beautifully (With One Look, Perfect Year).

The actors themselves were totally professional in what they did. They sang, they played instruments, they danced, they kissed, they portrayed their characters with aplomb. The actors who played Joe and Norma were solid and convincing. But I was absolutely impressed with the two supporting actors: Max von Mayerling, who is Norma's butler, and Betty Schaefer, who is Joe's love interest. The connection between Betty and Joe seemed so real; it was absolutely sad that they didn't end up together, and it appeared that Betty was crying for real when Joe decides to remain a bachelor. As for Max and Norma, the care that he shows towards her in her times of fragility was heartfelt and genuine. The climatic ending scene, when Norma says that classic line, portrayed that brilliantly.

Overall I loved it. It was on par with Phantom of the Opera, maybe even better. I wouldn't hesitate seeing this musical again and again!

This time I'm staying, I'm staying for good
I'll be back where I was born to be
With one look, I'll be me.

Being German For Three Weeks

If one day wasn't enough to be German, then how about three weeks then?

That was the challenge posed to me as Tina's parents stayed with us in Reading, coinciding with Easter. Before they arrived Tina explained to me that her parents do not speak any English, which scared me somewhat. Despite that I put on a brave face and said "awesome!" This spurred me into learning as much German as I could possibly manage, just so I could hold the most basic of conversations with them.

Earlier on, I resolved that I would start learning some languages during my time here. With the intention of travelling to Germany for the Berlin Marathon, the lessons learned from France over the New Year period, and the many different countries I wanted to visit, I took it upon myself to learn the languages of the countries I would go to, starting with French and German. I subscribed to a couple of podcast channels that teach French and German. It was the first step I took to become conversant in these languages.

When Tina's folks arrived, I introduced myself in German. Actually I rehearsed the introduction many many many times, in case I forgot how to say how are you or nice to meet you. The introduction went so easily, it felt like I was a fluent German speaker. But as time went on, and more German was spoken to me, I struggled to understand and struggled to say anything else. Podcasts can only teach you so much, and I have only learned for a couple of weeks. Often I had to speak slowly to them, sometimes in English, sometimes in German, most times incomprehensibly. It was quite tough for me and, I'm sure, for them too.

Indeed if it wasn't for Google Translate on my laptop, or my iPod Touch, I'd be stuck at sea without a paddle and a life jacket. I used Google Translate to translate the things I wanted to say in German. It is mostly accurate, but sometimes the words and the ordering can be incorrect, a case of Lost in Translation. So when I typed in the phrase Where did you go? in Google Translate, I got back Wo haben Sie?, which doesn't make sense in German. The correct way to say this is Wo Waren Sie?, which literally means Where were you?, but of course we don't say that in English. So I did get a few quizzical looks from Tina's parents when I said something in German that didn't make sense to them. It felt awkward when I said something that didn't come across correctly to them - I was afraid of saying the wrong thing!

But I did manage to have some conversation with them. Topics that I recall included:

• Occupation (what we did)
  
• Where we lived in New Zealand and Germany
  
• Music
  
• Sports
• Family
• Food
• Learning English and German
  

While in the office, I found some company whitepapers of Concerto and Rhapsody, a case study involving a customer reference site, and a background of my company, all in German! Sehr Gut! So I took these home and showed it to them, to better explain what my company is and what I actually did for a living. It's also a good public relations exercise too! I explained to them earlier that I am a Consultant, but that was a very general statement. I couldn't find a way to say that I was an Implementation Consultant or a Technical Consultant. Hopefully they got a better understanding upon reading those whitepapers; I couldn't have explained it on my own.

They return to Germany tomorrow, so that means I won't have many more opportunities to practice my newly-learned German. To reflect, they were quiet people and kept to themselves mostly. I didn't really see them much, and that meant I couldn't really speak to them as much as I would like to. Perhaps they weren't confident speaking English to me. But I definitely felt the same too. I wasn't confident speaking German either.

If it's any consolation, I learned a new language. And they were kind enough to say that my German was better than their English, even though I'm pretty sure we're at the same level in our learning of foreign languages. In reply, I tried to say that my German is bad, so I used Google Translate to translate "I speak bad German". Tina corrected me and said "no, you speak a little German". It was quite funny, because I knew exactly how to say that phrase in German. Ich spreche ein bisschen Deutsch. But it was also very nice encouragement.

Being German for one day was easy, but three weeks was pretty challenging. I hope to see them again when I visit Germany in September. Hopefully my German language skills will be much improved by then.

Easter. The German Way

Shamelessly ripped from Deutsche Welle

Although mainly a Christian holiday commemorating the crucifixion and resurrection of Jesus, Easter also marks the beginning of spring. The Germans, of course, have a whole range of customs and traditions to celebrate the change of seasons in proper fashion.

Eggs and bunnies are two of the oldest symbols of Easter in Germany and every spring shops boom with eggs and bunnies made of chocolate, cardboard or flowers in different sizes and wrappings.

The tradition for using eggs and bunnies for Easter originates from pagan worshipping where they were symbols of fertility and new birth and traditionally used for celebrations of the coming of the spring.

The Germans have a number of egg games which the children play over the holidays. One tradition is to blow eggs and paint them in multiple colours and patterns on Good Friday. The eggs are then put in a basket for the Easter bunny -- Osterhase-- to hide around the house on the night leading up to Easter Sunday. On the morning of Easter Sunday, the children go hunting for the eggs and often find that the Easter bunny has also left chocolate eggs and Easter presents for them to find.

It is also a custom that friends exchange the painted eggs as gifts or that young people in love paint eggs for their sweetheart.

One thing that living in the UK has exposed me to is the various cultures and traditions of our European neighbours, for example Germany. I wrote an earlier entry regarding Advent Sunday illustrating how I got to know more about the German traditions of celebrating Christmas. Now I am not knowledgeable in these traditions, these are simply my observations.

Tina and her mum were baking heavily over Easter while I was in London for the entire day. On Easter Sunday, just as I left for London very early in the morning, I managed to see a whole batch of cookies, shaped like Easter Bunnies, in the lounge. I was so impressed with their work, that I managed to take a couple of photos. I have not seen anything done like this in New Zealand, so I was most impressed and intrigued.
Now I presumed that these were going to be given out on Easter Sunday. In fact, they were given out to children at an Easter party that day. Unfortunately I never got to try one. Not even a piece of the bunny's ear, nor the tip of its tail, nor a crumb. Oh well, there is always next year!

But I did get a nice surprise in the wee hours of Easter Sunday morning when I got home from London. I found a boxed-up Belgian chocolate Easter Bunny on my bed. Just after I took the above photos, I left a thank you note on the kitchen door, which read:

Vielen Dank für den Osterhasen

Or, Thank you for the Easter Bunny, in English. Of course my German was not good enough to come up with that, so I added:

P.S. Shamelessly ripped from Google Translate!

Putting On The Ritz

Sunday 5th April 2009 was so far the most memorable day I've had in the UK. On that evening, I had the absolute pleasure and privilege to dine at The Ritz Hotel in London.

The event was organised by BritBound, a group that organises social events targeted towards new arrivals in the UK. I joined their Facebook group a couple of months after I arrived in the UK, but never managed to attend any of their events. However when I saw that one of the upcoming events was an evening at The Ritz Hotel, I couldn't pass on this opportunity. My RSVP was done quickly as there were only 20 spots available. The cost was £50 per person, which is actually very reasonable for dining at The Ritz Hotel. To stretch the wallet even further, I also decided to shout a good mate as he celebrated his birthday a few days prior.

Befitting the grandeur of The Ritz Hotel the dress code was very important. Gentleman must wear a tie and jacket, and ladies had to wear either a cocktail dress or a smart pair of trousers with top. No problem - I wasn't adverse to dressing up for a formal occasion and I have my own suit, so I was already sorted. All I had to do was pay the money, and turn up at the right hotel on time!

When myself and my mate got there, everyone inside the hotel looked very smart. The staff at the hotel took professionalism to a whole new level, from the way that they spoke to the guests, to holding the door open as you walked through. It was as if we were suddenly transformed into royalty.

We started by having drinks at The Rivoli Bar, where I drank a grapefruit juice and had a few nibbles. During this time we got to know a couple who hailed from Brazil, lived in New Zealand for a few years, and worked in the same industry as us. As we were relatively new to the UK, it was a chance to network and talk about our experiences.

After that, we headed to The Ritz Restaurant, or the most famous dining room in the world, where we had a sumptious 3-course meal. The atmosphere in the dining room was delightful. The lighting was dimmed to suit the mood, and the soft lush piano music lightly echoed throughout the room. For my meal, my entree was a rich onion soup with tortellini, the main was braised ox cheek (which was much larger than I expected), and the dessert was a caramel chocolate tart. The entire meal was absolutely delicious.

An interesting thing that I observed during dining was that no one at the table started eating until the waiters had presented the meals to all diners at the table. The meal, which was on a large plate, was covered by a large-sized brass cover. Once all diners were ready to eat, a group of waiters will pull off the covers in unison, to enhance the dining experience and heighten the anticipation of eating a fine meal.

The group that attended dinner that evening were mainly Antipodeans who had come from New Zealand, Australia and South Africa. In a country far away from home, with British and European accents flying everywhere, it was refreshing to meet fellow Antipodeans who I could relate to more easily. It was a time where I could pull out my Kiwi English, instead of the Queen's English to make myself more understood in this country, not that I've had to use Queen's English here. But I have been mindful of the way I speak to people here because I have been misinterpreted a few times due to my riul thuck Kiwi accent.

After we left The Ritz Restaurant, we did something totally forbidden. Maybe it was our Antipodean natures (after all, and I say this with tongue in cheek, Australia is convict country and New Zealand is Maori country), but we took out our cameras and started snapping at anything and everything inside The Ritz Hotel. I don't know how we got away with it, but we managed to snap easily over a hundred photos between all of us. When we were finally caught, we were reprimanded, but luckily our photos and cameras weren't taken away from us. Hopefully we didn't leave a bad impression on the staff, which might prevent us from dining there again in future.
I've only attended one BritBound event, but I can safely say that this event is one of the best ones organised by BritBound. Wining and dining at The Ritz with fellow BritBounders (expatriates from New Zealand, Australia, South Africa, etc) was an experience I would never have imagined when I first arrived in the UK. It was a great way to meet your fellow countrymen, and meet new BritBounders who have just arrived in the UK to start their big OEs.

Nothing can quite prepare you for the first time you step into The Ritz, the sheer grandeur, opulence and beauty of this legendary hotel is absolutely breathtaking. An experience unrivaled anywhere else, dining at The Ritz Hotel will give true meaning to the phrase wined & dined.

Jolly good show, chap!

Paving The Road To Berlin

Guten Tag! Wie geht's heute? Mir geht's schlecht...

As I alluded to before, I registered for the Berlin Marathon once I had received my prized £100 limit credit card. The credit card is now superceded by a card with an even bigger limit, so now my holiday roadshow can finally go on the road!

There is still 22 weeks away from the event, but this will hopefully give me enough time to prepare as I have set a lofty goal of sub 3:30:00 to complete it. With a 1:36:40 personal best in the Reading Half Marathon, the lofty goal for Berlin seems somewhat achievable. Maybe I could go even faster, but then again, a lot can happen in 22 weeks. I could lose motivation, I might even get injured, but hopefully it won't happen.

Unfortunately the start of my training has not started as well as I hoped. I had a very busy Easter holiday spending many many many hours in London. So, no time for training then. Once the holidays ended I got sick with a cold, so now I have been staying in bed. And of course, absolutely no training. It was not the ideal start. A few months ago I caught a cold, and it was one of the most sustained periods of illness I have ever endured, so hopefully I won't be so unfortunate this time around.

The Berlin Marathon is a very fast course, having set 3 world records in 2003, 2007 and 2008. So I'm hoping for a good fast time as well. The marathon goes through all the major landmarks in Berlin, so it's like a German history lesson as you run your way around the course. And the marathon also crosses the point where the Berlin Wall once stood, so you cross from East to West Berlin, like the defectors tried to do when fleeing the East. The finish line is near the Brandenburg Gate (Brandenburger Tor), it will be an absolute thrill running under this very famous European landmark as you sprint towards the finish. Finally the Berlin Marathon is one of the big five events that comprise the World Marathon Majors, the others being Boston, Chicago, London and New York. What an achievement it would be to do all those other races. It will be some time though, as entry into Boston, London and New York is very competitive.

Sehr Gut! I'm so excited for this event, I really cannot contain myself. But for now, I need to shake off this damn cold. Rest and recovery is the order of the day, I'm afraid.

Bis Später!